Crying Goodbye at BWI.

Michael left for Germany tonight.

I knew the day was coming, and mostly it didn't seem real that he'd be boarding that plane, crossing that ocean to start our life in another country before me. Especially in lieu of the tremendous snowstorm that pummeled us relentlessly earlier this week...I had a slither of hope that it would cancel flights and I'd steal at least one more day with him.

But alas, BWI was up and kinda running...or at least limping.

I admit it without shame, I bawled my eyes out. When Red Heads cry, it's not attractive. It's not cutesy. There isn't just one pretty tear drop sliding down your porcelain cheek like in a 1930's movie. It's more like...tears falling ninety to nothing out of puffy eyelids while sploshing over red splotches that resemble hives. I do myself the only favor I can....I buy waterproof mascara.

Anyways, I ended up crying en route. We stopped by the PX on post. It wasn't until after we navigated the huge walls of plowed snow, that we discovered that while the commissary was open for business, the Px, was not.
The roads were a mix of slush, ice and thick slick snow.
Lynsey called me after I'd stopped crying...but hearing her voice brought on the tears again.

Michael wanted to run for the border one last time before boarding the plane to the Land of no Taco Bell.

We finally made it to the airport. He was loaded down with huge duffle bags, suitcases, garment bags, backpacks and a small duffle.

We were directed to the "international' area of BWI.  It was like we were on the nina, pinta or the santa maria discovering new lands. I never knew that BWI had a whole area designated to international flights.
It's not a very large airport, so seeing they had an entirely different area for people who want to fly to exotic places like Montego Bay, Mumbai, Papeete, or Toronto was interesting to me.

Considering they shuffle these travelers to the opposite end of the airport, it makes it seem like a no mans land. Even the random quilts they have on display doesn't combat the edge of the world feeling you get walking through the dark corridor of the airport.

We pass Air Canada as the clerks looked at us longingly like "Ski Saskatchewan? No?" Insert shrug here.
We went directly to Air Command. An elderly gent whose TSA hat was askew said "Orders please? Gettcha Orders out. I needa see 'em."
Mike fished them out of his carry on. While I tried to pretend I hadn't been crying.
He looked over Mike's orders and said "How much ya weigh?" "How many weapons you got witcha?"

What? really? there's a weigh in on international flights? There's over a 2 feet of snow on the ground and this man is laying a weigh in on us? Forget the weapons comment. There's a man guessing weights for a flight to Ramstien? Does this come with some cotton candy or a goldfish in a plastic baggie?

Mike said "maybe it's to figure how much to fuel up."
I said "Well then I'm saying I weigh in at 375lbs."

The elderly gent then proceeded to give Mike sweet cutsies. Infact, we walked around people herder dividers, which had about 50 people probably en route to Toronto.
They held the line for him.

As we made our way to security, I felt my chin tremble again. Mike hugged me and kissed me and hugged me again. I proceeded to stain his shirt with tear drops.

And yeah, I know I'll be seeing him in 2 months give or take...But saying goodbye isn't a day at the carnival, even if there was a man guessing weights.
Saying goodbye to the person you love so completely is even more difficult.

Apparently baltimore travelers have never seen a woman cry saying goodbye to her husband at an airport.
Because let me tell you, people looked. No scratch that. They stared. They sat on the edge of their seats and ate popcorn watching us.

I watched my husband go through security. He turned back and waved. Once he got his boots back on his feet, he looked up, and searched til he saw me, he blew a kiss to me. I blew one back. And he turned around towards Germany.

I drove home on the dodgy roads through the ice and snow. Wrestled the car back into it's parking spot, sank into the snow trying to get to the path to the apartment, fought the keys to unlock the door, came inside and found a card from Micheal to me.

Telling me he loved me and he is carrying me in his heart.

And yeah, I cried again.